This is a list of articles I've been featured in discussing topics related to sexuality and dating during this time, for your reference and information. Please follow the most updated recommendations from the CDC, your local government, and healthcare provider.

Last updated: April 15, 2020 10:58 am PST

Due to Coronavirus, Sex Toy Sales Are Up, Stigma Is Down
Los Angeles Times, April 14

How to Find the Pandemic Sex Toy That's Right For You
Los Angeles Times, April 14

Single and Social Distancing? It's Normal to Feel Lonely
PopSugar, April 8

20 Ways to Have Phone Sex That Without Feeling Awkward AF
Cosmopolitan, April 7

5 Sex Positions to Try If You're in a Long-Distance Relationship During Coronavirus
Hello Giggles, April 2

Is It Just Me Or Is My Sex Drive Higher Than Usual?
Healthline, March 31

10 Reasons to Try Mutual Masturbation With Your Partner Tonight
Bustle, March 30

A Guide to Sex and Love in the Time of COVID-19
Healthline, March 21

How to Stop COVID-19 From Ruining Your Sex Life
Kinkly, March 20

12 Sex Toys Perfect for Physical Distancing or Self-Isolation
Healthline, March 20

Social distancing doesn’t have to be a buzzkill in the sex and romance department. With a little creativity and flexibility, you can spend quality time together and stay sexually connected, while also staying 6+ feet apart. Or whatever the recommended distance may be at the time you’re reading this.

1. Get your bodies moving and endorphins flowing with a living room dance party of 2- you on your end of the room, and they in theirs. Really get wild and learn some choreography from YouTube videos.
2. Play the Wikipedia Game. Hit random, read the first sentence, and see if they can guess the article. Hours of fun, and can be done from opposite sides of a long table.
3. Do a sexy striptease. All eyes, no touching.
4. Sign up for my Sex: Ask Me Anything Q&A on Zoom. I’m hosting a special event, so if you’re bored with Netflix, tune in for a different kind of show!
5. Get your nerd on and take a college course online together. Yale University and other schools offer free classes online. Watch course videos, quiz each other, and review one another’s homework, all possible 6+ feet apart or via video chat.
6. Do a photo scavenger hunt. Create a list of items to find- at home, in your yard, or non-populated outdoor space, and then go your separate ways to find and photograph your list. Text each other the photos to compare and discuss.
7. Set out hula hoops, ropes, balls, ladders, or whatever else you have lying around in your home or yard that would make a good obstacle course. Take turns running through it while the other clocks the timer, 6+ feet away.
8. Write erotic stories or poems. They don’t have to be good. The fun is in being creative, and reading them out loud to each other later- which stimulates your sense of hearing at a time when sense of touch may be off limits.
9. Make and compare Yes/No/Maybe Lists, like this one. Check all the sex acts that you’re into, and not into, and might be into. Swap lists. Makes a great conversation starter.
10. Drive out to the boonies, with no other people around, and star gaze.
11. Fill out the census.
12. Each of you get your favorite sex toy, and masturbate together on video chat.
13. Color. With coloring books, or with a piece of paper and some crayons. Good old fashioned fun.
14. Make your life bucket lists. Compare notes.
15. Play Trope Bingo. Pick a film genre prone to cliché (westerns, rom-coms, action, etc), create two bingo boards of common tropes, then select a movie to watch and see who gets Bingo first. Can be played via video chat or in person.
16. Write a journal about this unprecedented time right now- what’s going on, how you’re feeling, what has been disrupted in your life, and your sexual relationships. This will be interesting for you to look back on someday, and pure gold for future sexologists and historians who will cherish first account artifacts of this time.
17. Phone Sex. People use to pay $3.99 a minute for it, so don’t discount its erotic potential!
18. Invent a holiday. Again, works on opposite sides of the room, or via phone. Work together to think of the traditions, activities, foods, decorations, and special touches a random holiday you make up just for the two of you. Pick a future date to celebrate it every year.
    
19. Write each other a good old fashioned love letter.
    
20. Clean the house. Not the sexiest of dates, but put on your favorite playlist, and tackle the house together. It keeps you in separate rooms, but sharing an experience, and will give you a clean space to hunker down in.
21. If you live together, do a non-date. Cramped quarters for extended periods can breed cabin fever, irritability, and bickering. Take an intentional “date” to do you own thing, in your own corners, for a little while, so you don’t get on each other’s nerves.

This Saturday is February 29, and the last time that sentence was written was 1992.

Leap Day comes once every 4 years, and Leap Day on a Saturday graces us just once every 28 years. So make the most of this freebie day by filling it with love, sex, and romance.

1. Take a leap of faith and get married. Or renew your vows or commitment. Talk about bold!
2. Take a literal leap with an afternoon jumping date, like a trip to an indoor trampoline park, going skiing, or attending a horse show.
3. Make a time capsule together. Write each other a love letter and stick them in an envelope with a recent photo of you together. Don't open it until the next leap day in 2024.
4. Come up with 29 ideas together of ways to make your sex life sparkle. Buy a sex swing? Use a blindfold? Try to beat your personal sex-in-one-day record? Make the list, and start checking them off on February 29.
5. Splurge! This day only comes once every 28 years, so take this special Saturday and pour as much time, money, and romance that you can muster. Spend the night in a luxurious hotel. Get a couple’s massage. Pop champagne. Treat yourselves!
6. Give yourselves a redo of a past fail. Was Valentine’s Day a bust? Did you try to cook their favorite meal recently, and burn it? Was a new sex act you tried awkward and fumbly, or maybe a romantic evening turn into an argument? February 29 is a free day, so you get a do-over.
7. For the couples who like to learn and geek out together, read an article or watch a video about the orbital mechanics of the earth and the social constructs of the Gregorian calendar that bring us the Leap Day to begin with.
8. Beat a world record. Why not have some fun trying to beat the record for longest kiss (58 hours, 35 minutes, and 58 seconds), the most orgasms in one hour (134), or longest ejaculation distance (18 feet, 9 inches).
9. Try the Leap Day appropriate Leap Frog sex position.
10. Have sex all day. I mean…

You've heard of people buying the stranger in line behind them a cup of coffee or slice of pizza?

Let's do that for vibrators!

The Bullet is a perfect (and as you can see above, POWERFUL) vibrator for beginners. I'm offering vibrator newbies their first ever vibrator for FREE, and I invite vibrator veterans to help me give the gift of sexual liberation and exploration by sponsoring someone’s else’s first vibe for just $11.

For every vibe someone buys for someone else, I’ll donate one too! What a beautiful community to be a part of, and much more fun than a cup of coffee!

Head here to sponsor a vibe and here to request your first one free.

This is the part that hurts the most. All the evidence, all of the corroboration, all the expert testimony, all the likeable snow white victims in the world won’t make them do the right thing.

There could be video of the whole assault. Hell, he could confess! And it still wouldn’t be enough. Because it’s never been about whether they #believesurvivors or not. THEY JUST DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT SURVIVORS’ PAIN.

⚫ Because they are selfish and sexual assault survivors are inconvenient to their goals and their worldview.

⚫ Because they don’t value women enough to do the work of extending human compassion.

This is the sad reality that took me years as a young, optimistic sexologist to realize. Years and years of

⚫ "maybe they don’t understand"
⚫ “maybe they just need it explained this way”
⚫ "maybe they don’t know how common it is or how painful it is, so if we tell our stories and humanize it for them they will get it…“

…before finally it occurred to me that they understand perfectly fucking well. And they don’t care.
Btw: This "they” I reference isn’t just the Senate today. It’s the police. It’s college administrations. It’s the NFL. It’s the Catholic Church. It’s the news media. It’s every “nice guy” who seems like a perfectly normal rational functioning adult but is on Facebook saying “well I don’t know… she didn’t report it at the time…”

Because pretending be ignorant or judicious or “see both sides” makes you sound like less of a sociopath than that you’re simply cruel.
This is why I do the work that I do.
This is why WE NEED COMPASSION BASED SEXUALITY EDUCATION NOW.

Last week I decided to take a 7 day Self-Care Staycation and was away from work, email, and social media. Friends, you NEED to do this, even if it's only for one day.

This week I READ- for pleasure! 📖🏖️ I took a sexy bath with Ryan and tried my first EVER bath bomb and face mask. 🛀🏼 I went kayaking in some sea caves. 🛶🌊 I worked on a craft project I've wanted to do but have been putting off for literally two years. 🎨

Coincidentally, my 10 Day Sexual Self-Care Challenge started today. If you missed the course this time around, grab your spot now for the next one. Nurturing yourself, especially your sexuality, which is the first thing to get chopped when we feel we have a scarcity of time, energy, or compassion, is SO IMPORTANT!

The first hurdle is managing that voice that says "this is so indulgent and I don't deserve this." You DO deserve this nurturing, and that voice is something we address repeatedly in the online challenge. Reserve your seat here because it's limited to 20 people.